Weird weird weird week.
Okay, so it started out pretty good actually. I started working on the animation for transitioning from idle to run, and made some pretty decent progress on that front:
Not bad for a couple of hours of work anyway. Enough to be getting on with. Except around this point I started getting really stressed about project scheduling stuff, feeling like I didn’t know what to work on next, feeling like I was just aimlessly prodding at bits of the project, feeling like I wasn’t getting any real work done.
(Somewhere in this point I got in some music work that may or may not prove useful. Check out the daily devblog if you’re curious)
So I shifted my priorities. I started working exclusively on getting a schedule hammered out, figuring out everything I’d need to do to make the game a reality, making a comprehensive to-do list, etcetera.
And then my brain exploded.
Basically, uh, I have some anxiety issues, and the combination of pushing myself to do some kind of tedious work along with the doubt on whether or not this work would actually be useful completely triggered my brain into a self-loathing shutdown for a few days which I’m just now starting to get out of. After nearly having a panic attack triggered by a youtube video of a video-game cutscene, I decided it was time to take a little break.
I took a nap. I relaxed a little. I gave myself permission to not get a lot done for a couple of days. And, almost immediately, things started to get better. I won’t say I’m back at 100%, but things have been trending a lot better in the last day or two, so I think I’m over the worst of it.
And, which also helps with this, I’ve done all the scheduling I can reasonably do at this stage! I have a good breakdown of the entire first chapter of the game, which then gives me a good reason to get started on the second chapter, which I did today. I completed a writeup of the first area of the second chapter, and I got all of my notes transcribed and stored on the cloud so I don’t have to worry much about losing them any more.
So that’s all well and good, but we have now reached the end of February, my designated work month. What does this mean?
It means I’m going to be busy with stuff that isn’t Eve, but frankly I’ve ended up being busy with a lot of that stuff anyway. The only major difference is that once in a while some of that stuff will take up an entire day (IE driving across the state), and I’m probably going to have to dedicate some extra time and energy to lining up a place to live while I FINISH THIS SON OF A BITCH. That said, I am going to continue updating my daily devblog with, uh, daily updates. Check it out at Titan Seed if you’re curious! However, a few of those updates will probably be along the lines of “Oh I was super busy today so this update will consist entirely of this one little phrase or detail I thought of”
But they will be updates!
Once, there was a kingdom with two capital cities. One was beautiful and lively, the other one somber and quiet: The people called them the day city and the night city. The king, a wise man, valued both greatly. He knew it was of utmost importance to keep both cities safe and healthy if his country were to prosper, and he alone understood the delicate balance between them. Every day he sent out a letter which carefully instructed the people on how the cities were to be maintained, and thus kept them in perfect balance.
One day, the king was called away to a neighboring kingdom on a mission of peace. The letters slowed and stopped, which dismayed the people at first, but they soon adjusted to making their own decisions– for a while, that is. The people of the day city were too carefree, too joyous, and soon stopped worrying about the future.
Soon, the day city stopped being beautiful. Its streets filled with garbage and squalor, and the people began to leave, a trickle at first, then a torrent, until the entire city was empty but for vermin. They left, and where do you think they went?
They filled the night city to overflowing and then kept coming, lined up outside the gates, a great line of people which crossed the entire kingdom and entirely consumed the beautiful roads which the king had maintained so carefully. They waited, there, to come inside…
And waited… and waited… and waited…
Eventually, word of this came to the king as he negotiated in the neighboring kingdom, and he was furious. He sent a letter to his son, who himself was fresh back from a war, ordering him to find out what was going on and to figure out a solution.
The prince was dutiful, and went to see what could be done. He rode to the once-lively abandoned day city and nearly gagged at the stench, but when he tried to get inside he found the gates locked tight– with no one inside the city to open them.
He rode then to the night city, searching for help in opening the gates, but when he arrived it was almost as though he had never left the day city– the refugees had learned nothing, and turned the night city into a mess every bit as stinking and squalid as that they had left.
The prince tried his best. He commanded the people, organized them, brought them back to force the gates and re-establish the corpse of the day city, but to no avail. Nothing could bring back the dead cities, could make them any more than husks of what they once were. But he tried! He labored day and night until he was worn and stooped, and one day he looked up to see that the king had returned.
Side by side, they looked almost like brothers now, both beaten down and worn by grief and hard labor. The king helped him to his feet, then said:
“This place is over.”
The king said:
“Go, take the people, use what you’ve learned… start a new kingdom. And don’t… ever… leave.”
The king said:
“Make your own kingdom. I will stay with what’s left of mine.”
They said their farewells and the prince left, fighting tears. The king sat in the ruined city, sighed, and closed his eyes. He never moved again from that spot. Over time his body hardened in place, he took root, he grew leaves… Now, today, there stands just a tree where once stood two cities, one beautiful and lively, one somber and quiet.
